One Day Closer (to thin)

Today was a perfect day. Surrounded by temptation but I stayed strong. I'm going to remain strong.

Hopefully, since I did the whole metabolism-boost thing, I lose two pounds today (since it was absolutely perfect). Hopefully I'm a step closer to what I want to be.

My doodad. Sort of like keeping a rosary with you.

The scale almost killed me today. 126. That's 6 pounds over what I was. It doesn't help that where I was was no where near what I wanted to be. Now I'm even further from my goal. At least I'm guilt free today. I just kept my mind on my diet and flashed Ana quotes over and over in my mind.

Eat Less, Weigh Less


That's what has been on my mind a lot. Keeping my eyes on the prize. The ultimate prize. Thin. Perfection.

Let's see, 126. That means I have (not counting today) 8 days to lose 11 pounds. If I stay completely perfect, 11 pounds is perfectly attainable. I just need to focus and stay focused. Food is the enemy, remember that.

I honestly don't get how I fail so awesome. Food tastes great, but the quote really is true. Nothing tastes as good as thin feels. So why do I constantly fail? I know why, I lose focus on what I really want, more than ice cream, more than cake, more than chips. I want to be thin. And I will be. Every day is a new day, and I'm focused on making every day a Good Day. A perfect day.

Tomorrow is going to be difficult. Beach trip with people. Someone (I know who too) will take notice to the fact that I don't eat. But it's okay, I've got this. Game Plan: eat salad, just salad. Salad (when necessary) and nothing else but water. I know I can do this. I need to do this. If not, I'll just be fat forever. Look at those thighs Haven.

Fuck food. The scale is everything.

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Calories:

• Lunch: 10 grapes = 34 calories, 2 cup almond milk = 120 calories

• Dinner: 1 cup Simply Orange = 110 calories, 5 grapes = 17 calories

Total: 281

Excellent.